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The job of a parent is to establish, create and nurture a foundation for their children upon which those children can build their own lives. As parents, it’s often difficult making personal life-changing decisions when those decisions in turn impact the lives of your children. You weigh the pros and the cons, not about what’s good for you but what will make them happy and comfortable in their norm. Parents, especially moms, have been conditioned to making their kids’ happiness first instinct and top priority. For this reason, we stay in relationships and marriages that leave us unfulfilled, devalued and unhappy.

So how can moms and dads wanting to live healthier relational lives while parenting well-adjusted children without sacrificing their own happiness? First we have to get rid of the falsely held belief ingrained in us that wanting to be happy is selfish. It is not. We give our kids life but we don’t have to sacrifice our lives to keep them alive. Your kids love you and will be happy when they see you’re happy.

Staying in an unhappy relationship or marriage when you have kids is probably one of the worst things you can do for them. You’re giving them a front row seat to an unhealthy relationship and you’re telling them that being unhappy is an acceptable way to live. How can they value their own happiness when you don’t value yours? Pray, seek God’s wisdom. Talk to your kids, and make the best decision for YOU. You deserve to be happy. Your kids deserve to see you happy.