I posts on Facebook. I periodically respond to comments, especially by friends I actually know and like. It’s rare, really rare that I actually go on a random Facebook friend’s page. Honestly, I’m just not that curious about their daily feelings and accomplishments. If their statuses come across my newsfeed and they’re less that a paragraph long, I’d read them. But having few more minutes this morning, I stumbled on something. Something that was both sad, confusing and strange.
Nothing gives you a full online view of the state of someone’s relationship than Valentine’s Day Facebook posts. While looking through my newsfeed, I came across the post of a Facebooker who I knew had gotten married less than three years ago, but this Valentine’s Day, there weren’t the usual “hey look what he bought me and look what he did for me,” nor were there the seven paragraphs diatribe on the perfection of the relationship.
So I decided to actually visit her page. Perhaps she’d evolved from the show and tell pics and actually treated Valentine’s Day like a regular day. But when I opened her Facebook page, there were no signs of her sweet love’s existence. It’s like the guy who cleans up for the mob had come to her Facebook page and wiped away any trace or presence of this guy. He no longer existed on her page. Wedding photos were gone. Annoying make-out photos were gone. Posts about him and their lives were gone.
How did this happen? When did this happen? Why do I now care? I don’t know. But I couldn’t help but be both amazed and troubled by the amount of diligence it took to rid her Facebook life of the now former love of her life. Curiosity over the cause of the breakup didn’t cross my mind. I was too in awe by the way she made him disappear. Though I’ve met him and had seen them together and had glanced at their wedding pics, I found myself now questioning if he had ever truly existed. That’s how thorough her clean up was.
Then I felt cheated. Facebook is to document moments in our lives. By destroying every trace of her now ex is to remove a massive portion of her Facebook life, a life we all were forced to endure. We all had to live through those moments of perfect love and stomach churning kissing pics. Now to wipe away every memory of him, those years, those “us against the world” posts, is to make us all feel as if we didn’t feel what we felt and didn’t see what we saw. But she seems happy to be rid of him. But is that real? Or is this part of the clean up job? Who knows what to believe on Facebook.