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Because women have natural BS detectors, don’t lie Mr. Cain. You can lie to the American public, your accountant or even your doctor, but you can’t lie to a woman, especially your wife. She knows you too well.

Whatever you do, please don’t stop at an expensive jewelry store unless you plan to eat that diamond when she shoves it down your neck. Don’t bring flowers unless you want them placed on your grave. Don’t bring a pet. It will just remind her what a dog you are. Plus the dog will turn on you when he hears her breaking down your transgressions.

Speaking of transgressions, you may want to bring your pastor or spiritual leader. A third person with wisdom and Godly authority provides a big picture perspective. He will also help guide you in what not to say while giving Mrs.Cain a place to feel respected and valued; something you clearly have failed to do. If she kills you, he’ll be there to administer last rites.

Be prepared to come through the door in tears. Women usually won’t inflict further pain on a man who’s already visibly in pain, unless she’s gunning for a reality show. Make no excuses. Don’t try to get swagg-happy, eloquent and arrogant like you get when describing how you can fix the economy. That’s not going to work with Mrs.Cain. No, she doesn’t want to hear that. Neither does the American people.